How Not to Grow Weary as a People Pleaser


I will confess that I am a people pleaser to a certain degree, in that I want everyone around me happy. So I go to great lengths to make people happy and in so doing, usually make myself nauseous. With that being said, I only go so far and then my nauseousness turns to frustration. And my frustration turns to aggravation and then I’m in the flesh and those people have gotten on my lastnerve. Then I’ll turn to the word, and I’ll attempt to make it fit my agenda like the rest of the world does, and then I grow sick of myself. So I put it down and let Satan beat me with a big stick for a few days and then go back to it again with more determination to seek out the will of God in the matter that started out with me trying to make someone happy.


Romans 15:1-13 KJV
[1] We then that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves. /

There it is in black and white and bold, “Don’t make this about you Shari.” My life should not be about making myself happy, but rather as verse 2 continues on by saying [2] Let every one of us please his neighbour for his good to edification. [3] For even Christ pleased not himself; but, as it is written, The reproaches of them that reproached thee fell on me.

So I am in the right to please others so long as that pleasing edifies (Instructs or improves) someone. That’s an interesting fact, and continued frustration when you feel that your wisdom isn’t counted worthy. Enter Shari’s lifelong insecurities of being less and Satan has just managed to shut me up again. An additional problem is I am always on display with people, or so I feel that I am. I’ve been so vocal about my faith in Christ and my belief in the purpose of my life that I feel that people are watching me continually to see how I handle life; and lately, it hasn’t been handled very well. I’ve retreated from the gospel because of a lost hope. Not in Christ, but in purpose.


[4] For whatsoever things were written aforetime were written for our learning, that we through patience and comfort of the scriptures might have hope.

There is an image I attempted to find where a woman was wrapped up in Christ’s arms but it was all done by word art. it always makes my heart happy when i see it because it depicts how I feel when I read the word of God. I feel as though He has come to earth and wrapped me up in His love. It’s a real feeling and not one contrived in my mind by an artist, but rather expressed by that artist.

A sure fire way of losing hope is to get out of the word of God. I know from much experience in the matter. I also know that the way to find hope is to get back in the word of God and read until God shines the light on what you need. He did just that in Romans this morning when I read that the Old and the New were written to give me hope. That every word has purpose, just like me.


[5] Now the God of patience and consolation grant you to be likeminded one toward another according to Christ Jesus: [6] That ye may with one mind and one mouth glorify God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.

There have been so many people in my past that have shown me how to praise and glorify God by their relationship with God. It’s another issue with my very faulty wiring in that I struggle with fitting someone else’s mold. Because I know I was never meant to fit their mold. That’s theirs. But if what I feel doesn’t align with what they feel and I make them uncomfortable, what do I do? I can tell you. Just as I retreated from the word of God, I retreat from the way God made me.

According to His word, we’re to be likeminded “toward another” according to Christ. That means I should be okay with how Christ designed them, and they should be okay with how Christ designed me so long as the two have foundation in scripture. One can be mild and one can be loud and both can be right.


[7] Wherefore receive ye one another, as Christ also received us to the glory of God. [8] Now I say that Jesus Christ was a minister of the circumcision for the truth of God, to confirm the promises made unto the fathers: [9] And that the Gentiles might glorify God for his mercy; as it is written, For this cause I will confess to thee among the Gentiles, and sing unto thy name. [10] And again he saith, Rejoice, ye Gentiles, with his people.

The first of God’s people were the Jews. Who overtime grew into a very formal, religious group of people who followed the law and loved rule making. And then came the Gentiles, a world of rebels who didn’t fit the religious mold. They went against their grain by not holding a formal service, not washing their hands enough, not doing all the “things” the religious did. And if I were to guess at what happened in their services that was also different was their manner of praise. They had so much to be thankful for. The God of the universe had deemed them worthy to be a part of His family through the blood of Christ. The acceptance of the blood He shed for their salvation. Because of that their worship would have likely differed drastically from what the Jews were used to. But now the Jews and the Gentiles were worshipping together. Do you suppose some took issue with the loud mouthed coverts and caused division? I do. I’m pretty sure, I’d have been a loud mouth!


[11] And again, Praise the Lord, all ye Gentiles; and laud him, all ye people. [12] And again, Esaias saith, There shall be a root of Jesse, and he that shall rise to reign over the Gentiles; in him shall the Gentiles trust. [13] Now the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, that ye may abound in hope, through the power of the Holy Ghost.

As I’ve stated… I’m loud. I have to reign myself in on a daily basis not to be center stage in any conversation or action. My personality is such that I believe God designed me to be heard, but He humbles me by putting people in my life who don’t want to hear me. It’s a truth I can’t fathom. I mean, who wouldn’t want to hear me, right? Kidding.

Romans 12:15-16 KJV
[15] Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep. [16] Be of the same mind one toward another. Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits.

So my take away from today’s discussion with God is, “It’s okay to be me.” So long as “me” represent’s Him. He told me I needed to “LAUD” Him. That means praise Him highly. That does not sound quiet to me. Just sayin’.

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Shari Johnson. (aka The Jesus Chick) has been encouraging women of faith and youth for a closer walk with Christ for over ten years. Having a burden for the leadership in American Churches, much of her writing is meant to spear on the servant of God to do more for the cause of Christ in these uncertain times. With humor, transparency and solid bible teaching Shari outlines messages that are easily understood, life applicable, and often with easily remembered points to ponder in hopes that they’ll be reflected on throughout the day and serve as encouragement on the go. Her servant’s heart is grounded in her own local church believing that it is there that the greatest impact can be made and unfortunately suffers the greatest neglect across America. Shari speaks at women’s gatherings in hopes of leaving a giggle in their soul and a burning desire to serve in their own local body of believers having it said of her “I laughed, I cried, and I was drawn to the foot of the cross…” Which is what it’s all about. For information on scheduling Shari, call her direct at (304)377-6036, message her via email at or find her on Facebook!

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