Absentee Father’s Day


      Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward.  Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth.  Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.”                  (Psalms 127:3-5)

Father’s Day is coming.   For most families, this is either a joyful day of honoring their fathers in celebration, or fondly, though sad, remembering those who have passed.   I pray that such families will have an opportunity to show some love in some way on this Father’s Day, 2020.

However, in our world today, we have so many men who do not deserve the God-given title of father.   There are too many men who shun their responsibility of bringing up a child to face the world by abandoning them.  It is no better in situations where the father is in the home, but not training up the child in the way that he should go.  When one refuses to teach his kids how to be responsible citizens, he is no better than the uncontrolled child.  To both of those men I say, “Shame on you!”   Not only do you not deserve to be called, father, but you do not deserve to be referred to as a man.  You are less than a man in your treatment of a child.  Rejection of a child can come from abandonment, or ignoring while present.   Rejection is the root of behavioral problems of all kinds within our nation’s children.

Many things can cause or be the root of rejection, but here I am speaking directly to the rejections caused by absentee or uncaring dads.  The feelings of rejection are sometimes clearly felt, and sometimes the root cause is not stated, but the fruit of rejection is clearly present.  There can be aggressive reactions which may be seen as: rebellion, fighting, stubbornness, aggressive attitudes, hardness, and bad language.

There can be self-rejection indications:  low self-esteem, self-condemnation, anxiety, depression, hopelessness, and negativity.

These are just a few things I have mentioned which are the fruits of the children of absentee or uncaring dads.   To those dads I say, aren’t you really proud of yourselves?!   You have not simply damaged a child, but a family, a community, and even a nation.

It is no wonder that our prisons are filled with young people who never had a father-figure in their lives.  Our cities are filled with fatherless young people who try to find some kind of acceptance through gangs, drugs, crime, and even living on the streets.  It is the fruit of your loins that are rioting, looting and causing so much damage and violence against others in the streets of America today.   Their behavior, as we see it today, cannot be justified by the actions of a few long ago.  Their seething anger that they unashamedly cast on total strangers is unknowingly meant for you in your selfish choice to have a relationship that brings a child into a lonely and often hungry (hungry for a father’s love) world.

God will deal with your multiple sins against the God ordained family unit.  Your only hope of rescue is to seek forgiveness from God through Jesus Christ our LORD.  He quickly forgives a humble and sorrowful heart over sin.  However, the ones you have hurt may find it more difficult to release you from the hurt you have caused.  But, it is worth pursuing at any cost.    Finally, be a man; be a father. 

“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise:  that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth.

And you, fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath, but bring them up in the training and admonition of the Lord.”              (Ephesians 6:1-4)

To you dads who have held up your responsibilities, I applaud you!   To everyone, I truly pray that this will be a spectacular Father’s Day for you; one filled with much, much love . . . and maybe some cake and ice cream!   God bless you!

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